For families of superyacht crew, the long months apart can feel like absolute crap!

I recently spoke with a military psychologist, who explained…

Just like in the military, where families are separated for long deployments, those of us in the superyacht industry face our own unique challenges when it comes to being apart from our loved ones.

The time apart isn’t just tough on those who head offshore; it’s tough on those left behind, too.

Being away from your partner, parent, or loved one for months at a time is challenging in more ways than one.

But with the right mindset, communication, and support, you can stay connected, resilient, and strong—no matter how far apart you are.

Understanding the Impact of Separation

Let’s be real—long separations are hard on everyone. Here are some of the key challenges:

- Emotional Stress: Being apart for months can lead to feelings of loneliness, anxiety, and sadness, both for the crew member at sea and the family back home. The person at sea may feel guilty for leaving, while those at home can feel isolated and overwhelmed by the responsibilities left behind.

- Communication Hurdles: Time zone differences, limited internet access, and the demands of life on board can make regular communication difficult. It’s easy for misunderstandings to creep in or for the lack of contact to make you feel disconnected.

- Shifting Roles: When one person goes to sea, the other often has to take on extra responsibilities—everything from managing the household to dealing with emergencies. This can be overwhelming and create a sense of imbalance in the relationship.

- Reintegration Challenges: When the crew member returns, there’s often a tricky period of readjustment. The person at home has gotten used to managing things on their own, and suddenly shifting back to being a team can be challenging.

Strategies for Managing Separation

Here are some tried-and-true strategies to help you and your family navigate the ups and downs of separation:

1. Pre-Departure Planning:

- Communication Plan: Before heading offshore, set up a communication plan. Discuss how often you’ll be in touch and what methods you’ll use (email, calls, video chats). Having a plan helps reduce anxiety and sets expectations.

- Sharing Responsibilities: Talk about who will handle what while you’re apart. This includes finances, childcare, and any other day-to-day tasks. Clear agreements can help prevent stress and misunderstandings later on.

2. Staying Connected:

- Get Creative: When communication isn’t easy, get creative! Write letters or emails that can be read during downtime, send postcards, video yourself reading a book to your kids, or share photos and videos. Little gestures like this help keep the connection alive.

- Create Rituals: Develop small rituals that help you feel connected, like watching the same movie and chatting about it later, or setting aside time for a weekly check-in. These rituals create consistency and a sense of togetherness.

3. Emotional Support:

- Stay in the Loop: Knowing what your loved one is going through at sea can help ease worries and foster understanding. Share details about your daily lives, so you both feel involved and connected.

- Seek Support: Don’t be afraid to lean on others for support. Connect with other families who are in the same boat (pun intended). Sharing experiences and advice can make a world of difference.

4. Mental Health Resources:

- Counseling Services: If the separation is taking a toll, consider professional counseling. Sometimes, talking to someone outside your situation can offer new perspectives and coping strategies.

- Build Resilience: Engage in activities that help build resilience, like mindfulness, exercise, or hobbies. Staying mentally and physically strong is key to handling the ups and downs of separation.

5. Reintegration Planning:

- Prepare for the Return: Just as you plan for the departure, plan for the return. Talk about how things might have changed and how you’ll reintegrate into daily life together. Open communication can make this transition smoother.

- Take It Slow: Give yourselves time to adjust when your loved one returns. Reintegration can be just as challenging as separation, so be patient with each other.

Final Thoughts

Separation is tough, but with the right mindset and strategies, you can navigate these challenges and come out stronger on the other side. Whether you’re the one heading out to sea or the one holding down the fort at home, remember that you’re a team—even when you’re miles apart.

By staying connected, supporting each other, and planning ahead, you can keep your relationship strong and healthy, no matter how long the separation. Just like any relationship, it takes skill, patience, and a lot of love.

You’ve got this.

Ps. Still working on my digital art and lost 10 minutes of my life trying to teach my AI assistant about sail trim on yachts, I gave up. We are sailing strait off the dock!